Rant 5: When I Get a Pet Carrier Pigeon

I wonder how many people would be rather cross with me if I suddenly showed up without any warning or precursor, and began a gigantic rant. If the number was between zero and three, then I would know that less than a handful of people were, and if the number was higher, then I would use a proper term to describe that as well. The best part of making such a long winded, random rant is the complete improvization of said rant, as my only real goal is to get the little pencil icon moving for a long time, thus giving the illusion that I have a long story to tell, with a charming protagonist, a cunning antagonist, a cute love interest, and another word that begins with the letter "c" side character. But, that I do not have. Instead, I can only talk about the greatness of seeing a huge amount of numbers on the amount of times people said anything contained herein this Skype chat. Or, I could talk about what I would do if I randomly owned a carrier pigeon. I would use it to send heavy things to drop on people's heads. Then, they'd see they were outsmarted by a neon green and red pigeon(yes, I painted him(so I could see him in the dark and not lose him)) and they would laugh. How could you not laugh. Even your friends would laugh if they saw a pigeon drop a bowling ball on your head(yes, this pigeon is the Schwarzenegger of pigeons). Then, I would teach it to do other remarkable things, like change the channel on the television, cook pasta, be drummer for an awesome rock band, and spit on Mitt Romney. If I had this pigeon, I would probably rule the world, and two thirds of the moon. The Russians can have Mercury though, because that planet is lame.